Are you happy? That is a question I was asked toward the end of a past relationship.
I looked at the other and said "Define what happy is and I will tell you." I only got a blank look back in return.
I have had 3 years to process that interaction and have put at least one of the pieces together. In this others case happiness for them, at least in their then thinking, was to control everything possible in their life and the lives of those close to them. The premise was if I keep everything the way I want it and have everyone act the way I want them to then I will be happy.
Trust me when I say THAT IS A LOT OF WORK. I know because I have tried that process. Trying to keep all the planets aligned in the universe takes a lot of concentration and energy. It is consuming and doesn't leave anyone much free time. Of course, I am being facetious.
I can't name the moment but long ago I let go of a lot of the need to control others and their actions. I learned to let people do what they do. I offer my thoughts when I can and those around me have the option to take the advice or not.
At that point my work is done and I go on my way.
One thing to consider is if you are trying to control others you are denying them their opportunity to explore and discover. Your best bet is to be the model of who you really are and others around you will either choose to incorporate your modeled traits or modify what they see.
Have a great day out there and if I see the moon moving through the skies differently I will know that you decided to let go and that you found another process to MAKE YOU HAPPY